Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize