yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
