It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
So much Jack, so little girl.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
