I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Randomize
