Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize