Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
