We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
