I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I need water and some morals
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
