well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
