I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Randomize
