If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
