I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
