Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
