I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Green mimosas i think yes
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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