If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I have fence marks all over my body
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
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