the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
