New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
