Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Found the puke drawer
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Randomize
