I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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