I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Randomize
