therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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