I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
