I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
