I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
