If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize