So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize