can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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