Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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