you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
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