Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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