We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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