Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Randomize
