The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize
