My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
How external is "for external use only"?
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
