My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
