He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
