The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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