I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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