can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
