Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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