so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Randomize
