my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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