He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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