Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize