don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
