Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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