Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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