As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
