I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Randomize
