you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
