he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
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